Allright, so the answer for future reference. Thank you so much for support to help with this.
/etc/vmware/networking
It has a copy if the list of interfaces that vmware "made up" (those have a "-1" at the end) and it has the interface currently assigned to the bridge for vmware, with a "0" at the end. You cannot edit it with a correct list of interfaces (with the "-1"), however, if you just stick the correct interface into the main entry (with the "0" at the end it will keep that setting.
[code]
VERSION=1,0
answer VNL_DEFAULT_BRIDGE_VNET -1
add_bridge_mapping bridgestb -1
add_bridge_mapping eth0 -1
add_bridge_mapping ethmain1 -1
add_bridge_mapping eth3 -1
add_bridge_mapping eth5 -1
add_bridge_mapping tap4 -1
add_bridge_mapping ethmain1 0
[/code]
First line "ethmain1" is ignored but the last line sticks, and things work.